How I almost lost it on an Okada

I haven’t told a tale in a while but I hope it’s well worth the wait…okay, I admit, I’m not sure you’ll like it; but I’ll tell you anyway.

So, all summer I’ve been working on a project and recently I went out for an assignment with one of my team members, a guy (yay, you’d say but you’ve not heard anything yet o). On a normal day ehn, I like taking okada, like, there’s just this freeing feeling but girls, I hope you’ll agree with me that it’s not the most comfortable thing to be in between a male okadaman and a guy. Well, that’s what happened to me on our way back. It’s not like we had not been taking bikes since o, we had, but I’d been managing it and generally being a good sport. Not to forget that the guy I went with was so awesome, he kept making me laugh, like it was just so much fun…until that final bike ride back.


As you can guess, I was sandwiched between my friend and yet another okadaman. And this time, I couldn’t take it anymore. You might wonder at this considering that I’d successfully endured through the other okada rides and even some not so pleasant keke napep rides as well.

Anyway, the real reason I couldn’t stand this particular ride was that the okada man reeked, as in; this man was oozing bad smell. Ah, people, that smell was bad! The man had on one weird dark jacket like this and I cannot even begin to imagine where that jacket has been or when last it was even washed, if it has ever been washed. When I now told my wonderful (note the sarcasm) partner, he laughed at me (trust me, I’ll probably still get him for all those times he laughed at me). I had to be turning my head from side to side, when I’m not Ariana Grande (if you know, you know). Then the rubbish boy I went out with now said I should lean back into him that he doesn’t mind and all that nonsense. Brother, if only you knew how much I’ve endured being sandwiched between you and okadaman, I should now lean back.

Aye le o.

I suffered o, and the place we were going to was far. When we finally got to where we were going, i was only too happy to fly off.

I decided to share this with you guys, like, I want sympathy, plenty of it in fact. The suffer-ness was just too much.

Please ehn, if you know any okadaman out there, abeg tell them to make sure they always smell nice, I don’t think it’s only me that’s had this kind of sad experience. Beware okadamen with the “scent”, at least pity your poor nose. It was a ride to remember, just not a very good one. Bye-bye now.


VOCABULARY: ehn– a Nigerian slang used to make emphasis, okada– a Nigerian slang for a motorcycle, okadaman/okadaman– a Nigerian slang for a motorcycle rider, Chai!– a sad exclamation, keke napep– the Nigerian slang for tricycles, Aye le o– Yoruba for “life is hard”, abeg– please


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