?Sometimes ehn, all these younger sisters can like to try and show themselves too much. As in, imagine this small girl of yesterday that they gave birth to in front of me. Rubbish.
So, ask me what happened na. Very simple. I met a fine babe yesterday and as the smooth guy that I am, I got her Instagram handle. The only small problem was that I didn’t have Instagram on my phone because of storage space + all the ‘efiko’ apps I downloaded (please who can relate with this storage space struggle?)
Anyway, I went to ask my younger sister if I could borrow her phone to use for Instagram but she was sleeping. Sleeping! Sleeping ke? At this critical time when I was about to shoot the shot that would shoot me out of St. Singlehood. Never! So, I woke her up to ask her for the phone and her password (every 16-year-old has that these days…jeez).
Mama now woke up in anger and started attacking me with her claws (yes o, claws that she calls nails). See me see trouble eh.
‘Calm down, calm down’, she refused to hear word.
‘Shioooor! What can you do? Oshisco plc’. Imagine, she even had the effrontery to ask me what I would do.
‘Temi, you’re testing my patience o.’
‘What sef? What?’ she kept shouting so I left her alone because if I had unleashed my anger on her then, it would not have been funny.
I waited for her to sleep off very well. Then, I took her phone, hacked it, messaged my princess charming and deleted all her images, videos and apps. Let her wake up to a brand-new phone tomorrow. Shebi it’s because I even asked her for it before. Spoilt brat.
She woke up and started ranting and crying, making noise upandan the house. I didn’t even look at her side. ‘Biola, I’m sorry.’ She came to my room to apologise to me. I didn’t even do as if I heard her. Earpiece + Ed Sheeran and I blocked the little rat out. After she had cried and lamented for three days straight, I just decided to pity her. I got the files I backed up on GoogleDrive and helped her reinstall everything. Next time she’s wondering what I can do, she’ll remember this day. You think sey you fit buy three years for market abi…
ehn or eh or na or ke– used to emphasize a statement or indicate a question; efiko– smarty pants; shioooor– a slang used to mock or deride a person; oshisco plc- an insult, stupid person; sef or shebi– used to indicate a question; upandan– up and down; you think sey you fit buy three years for market abi- you think you can buy three years in the market
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